Wine Bottle Sizes

I have a hard time throwing things away.

Today I've been spending time trying to sort through piles of papers in my office in hopes of finding some empty desktop space underneath - actual empty physical space.

In one pile I found this small piece of paper clipped from a Wired Magazine - dated November 2012, more than four years ago.

I saved this because I thought it would make a nice subject for a blog post.  I tossed the rest of the magazine and have since stopped my subscription to Wired.  There's just so many articles a guy can read in one lifetime making the point that computers and the big businesses they inspire will save the world.  (It's not true no matter how futuristic you think you are.)

Anyway, here's that scrap of paper . . .

And here's the same list in list form:

Containers for wine and spirits (by liters):

• Magnum: 1.5
• jeroboam: 3
• flagon: 3.785
• rehoboam: 4.5
• Methuselah: 6
• Salmanazar: 9
• Nebuchadnezzar: 15
• rundlet: 68.2
• tierce: 159
• barrique: 225
• hogshead: 239
• firkin: 318
• butt: 477

Only "rundlet" fails Google's online spell checker.

Most bottles of wine and booze in the stores around here are 750 milliliters, or half a Magnum.

Why, I wonder, are some of these items capitalized and others not.  If only names are capitalized, who is Magnum?  Here's an actual picture of Nebuchadnezzar that I found on line.

And here's our cat, Spackle Puss inspecting the magnum of beer - oops, excuse me - the Magnum of beer gifted to us on New Years.

We also had a Magnum of champagne gifted to us on Thanksgiving.  I guess Magnums are the thing now, huh?  Thanks to Mark and Peter for the magnanimous gifting.

Now that the clipping from the magazine is safely preserved for eternity here on Mixed Meters, I've tossed the physical paper into the trash.  A very very small amount of empty space in my office has thus been created.

Here's an MM post with a picture of a skunk hunt.  Same deal - the picture got tossed in a cleanup after it was preserved in online pixels.

And here's another post called Desktop Stilllife - with pictures of cats and a video with music.

More Musical Marketing Words

As a Mixed Meters occasional feature we present pictures of musically named products and companies. Or maybe it's a bug.  Either way, if you've been waiting for another episode, wait no longer.

This time we have

• A famous Austrian composer at the mall selling valuable things.
• A carbonated mixture of vodka and white wine which has become a simple and unconditional fusion melody.
• Three vegetarian combinations of a melodic nature. (It's a medley of medleys.)
• A work of art with Japanese raw fish and rice.
• Another work of art in financial services.  (This one must be complicated because it requires a conductor holding a baton.)
• A studio where the conductor points to the performers just as they're supposed to start playing!!!

This is the eighth episode in the series. See all of them.

Click a picture - it should get bigger.

Term Tags: musical terminology. . . product names. . . opus numbers

Jacques Derrida says Viola

Here is a link to a post about philosopher Jacques Derrida and composer Ryuichi Sakamoto from the WFMU blog. If you go to the post you'll see its title:

Ryuichi Sakamoto and "Derrida," a Decade Later

"Derrida" in quotes refers to a movie which Sakamoto scored.  But if you inspect the link, you'll discover that the post has quite a different title:

http://blog.wfmu.org/freeform/2012/04/derrida-is-the-indisputable-master-of-thoughtful-put-downs-and-of-course-deconstructing-our-most-basic-assumptions-thoug.html

Hidden meanings abound.  We should expect nothing less from an article about Derrida who, afterall, gave us the term "deconstruction" - whatever that is.

I wasn't thrilled with Sakamoto's music in the post.  So I watched a couple of film clips of Derrida himself in hopes that the article would not be a complete waste of time.  He spoke mostly in French.  There were subtitles.  One particular subtitle became the inspiration for this post on Mixed Meters.

At the end of the clip entitled Jacques Derrida on American Attitude he concludes his pointless response with the classic French form of Q.E.D. "voilà".

But if the subtitle is to be believed (at 3'22"), I must have misheard.

It must mean something deep.  I suggest that you not think about it too hard. Unless you're a violist. Or a voilaist.

Here's a short video of a viola deconstruction.

---

Here at MM we realize that there are always at least two ways of looking at anything.  So I am proud to announce that this is Mixed Meters' six hundredth post, or maybe, if you'd rather believe Google, the host of Blogger, this is actually number 601.  Either way a highly insignificant milestone has finally been passed.  Thanks for reading - whoever you are.

Voilà Tags: Jacques Derrida. . . Ryuichi Sakamoto. . . viola. . . subtitles. . . voilà

Musical Terms in the Marketplace

It's another episode of a favorite on-going irregular MM feature.  You can count on it to appear when my time is short and I need a simple post requiring minimal thought.

The previous installment featured only potable music and this time we drink in two more: a pluckable tequila and a liquid Italian opera composer, who, it turns out, goes over well with babies and children.  Next are two masters of their art followed by two signs of a euphonious city.  Also watch out for a smokin' military wake-up call and a garden variety string instrument for less than $5.

Finally, this collection ends with a cheesy pun.

You can see all of Mixed Meters' pictures showing products and companies with musical names.  This post is the sixth in the series.

So who is the Young Maestro?

Musical Term Tags: musical terminology. . . product names

Frustration Etude Number One

Here's my guarantee: none of the words in this post will be the F-Word itself.  However, you should be aware that The Word is essential to my subject.  You'll have to think about The Word if you read more.  Now is the time to quit reading if you're offended by even thinking about that particular profane taboo word.  (Yeah.  You know that I know that you know what it is.)

Be warned: the guarantee is limited to written words only.  It does NOT cover the short musical composition, Frustration Etude Number One.  You'll find the listening link below.

I've engaged in a form of f-ing self-censorship by not using The Word directly, only referring to it euphemistically,  because I'm trying to be sensitive to the feelings of my readers.  The Word has previously appeared casually elsewhere in Mixed Meters.  (Click here to see where.) I'm sure it will again.  I'm confident that those people who actually click through to hear my music are strong enough to withstand the onslaught of profanity to come.

I hear you asking, why did I compose a piece where the only lyric is ... The F-Word?

Because I too often find myself using That Word for a particular purpose and I would like to stop using it that way.  The particular unwanted purpose is to scream F*** at the top of my voice as an expression of my frustration.  I only do this in private - like while I'm driving.  Sometimes in the shower.

However, there's a problem with this behavior: screaming F*** at the top of my voice doesn't really salve my frustrations.

So I attempted a very personal compositional experiment.  I theorized that featuring "The Word" in a piece of music would help me give up using it.  Writing music has to be good for something, right?  Maybe it can help me deal with my frustrations.

So far the experiment seems to be a qualified success.  Of course there is no way to test the theory scientifically.  All the evidence is anecdotal.  To be safe I added "Number One" to the title because I expect future doses of this musico-linguistic medication, in the form of other similar etudes, might be required.  I have not composed a Frustration Etude Number Two ... yet.  (Send in some recordings of you or your friends screaming/singing/saying The F-Word.  Maybe that would inspire to compose a second etude.)

Frustration Etude Number One contains The F-Word over 30 times.  This is one of those pieces which I've described as being "my finger in your eye".  It also has a lot of microtonal disonances and untempered intervals.  Whats more, this piece quotes in vain a certain famous American folk melody, one many people might consider sacred or spiritual.  Consider yourself warned.


If you do decide to listen to this etude, you should be very concerned whether other people, for example co-workers or children or Republicans, can hear it.  This is the essence of NSFW - Not Safe For Work.

Click this picture of the rusty thing on a telephone pole to hear Frustration Etude Number One
Copyright © 2011  by David Ocker - 100 seconds

Here's an interesting article on the history and legal aspects of saying THAT word in public.  Some of the stories are pretty funny.



Take a Flying Duck Tags: F-word. . . profanity

More Musical Signs

Mixed Meters has had several on-going photo series. For example, there was Fallen Avocados,  Blank Wall and Bunnies and Balloons.  No, these don't make much sense.  Why would you expect this blog to make sense? 

Another series involves pictures of business or product signs which use musical terminology.  Apparently many musical words hold some mysterious fascination for the non-musical.  Maybe musical words increase sales. 

This post is the fourth in a series.  In part one we learned the words trio, forte, cornet, arpeggio, aria and allegro. In part two there was koda, tritono and concerto.  Part three included melody, allegro, opera, counterpoint, cantata and Amadeus.

Today's word list includes several musical forms: aria, sonata and symphony plus one which contains only an opening movement.  There's a score, one on which it is forbidden to walk, plus parts.  I think these parts are for the sonata in the previous picture.  And finally there's a musical apartment building moving at a speed related to its latitude.

Do you wonder what The 1st Movement or Vizual Symphony do?
Yes, you can click on any picture to embiggen it.
All of the pictures were taken in Pasadena, CA.

Tags North: Musical Terminology

Speaking Fluent GIbberish

Sid Caesar used to do comedy sketches where he'd pretend to speak a foreign language like German or Japanese. It was funny but of course it was completely meaningless to people who actually spoke those languages.

Here's a video of an Italian singer Adriano Celentano doing exactly the same thing to English. This is what we sound like to them. The song is called Prisencolinensinainciusol. (If you want more, the color bits of this video come from this clip. There's a more recent Italian TV performance here. But to watch those two clips it would be helpful to actually speak Italian.)

Leslie saw this video and said "Good use of mirrors." Found via WFMU Beware the Blog

ADDENDUM: Some helpful soul has decoded the lyrics of this song and added subtitles. You can find out what he's singing about here. National Twosome.

Here's a Mixed Meters post which features another unknown-to-America Italian artist: Osvaldo Cavandoli of La Linea fame. (Watch the video.)


Prisencolinensinainciusol Tags: gibberish. . . Adriano Celentano

Hidden Meanings

These are carefully cropped pictures of various Pasadena signs. This process reveals secret messages.







And here are two in honor of Halloween.



The last is part of a church name. Sorry, no pictures of pumpkins this year. You can find some here. One of MM's earliest posts concerned Halloween movies.

Similar silly MM photo essays:
Crooked
Musical Merchants
Branches Before Blue
Gloves In the Wild
Fence Shadows
Graffiti Animals of California
Buckets for Babies in Pasadena
HALF GRASSED

This one, Taggers With Spellcheck, also deals with words.

Here's a bonus.



Partial Tags: partial signs. . . hidden meaning. . . Halloween

Old Word Power

A link to this article: Collins dictionary asks public to rescue outdated words appeared in my email thanks to Scott, Mixed Meters' reader in Boston.

Apparently English lexicographers must jettison some old words from their fixed-length dictionary in order to make room for all the new, hip jargon you and I wince at every day. They're asking people if they might like to make use of those antique words before they're lost forever.


Here's a list of twenty words on the chopping block. You could adopt one or two if they strike your fancy.

Astergent - cleansing or scouring
Agrestic - rural, rustic, unpolished, uncouth
Apodeictic - unquestionably true by virtue of demonstration
Caducity - perishableness, senility
Calignosity - dimness, darkness
Compossible - possible in coexistence with something else
Embrangle - confuse or entangle
Exuviate - to shed (a skin or similar outer covering)
Fatidical - prophetic
Fusby - short, stout, squat
Griseous -streaked or mixed with grey
Malison - a curse
Manseutude -gentleness or kindness
Muliebrity - the condition of being a woman
Niddering - cowardly
Nitid -bright, glistening
Oppugnant - combative, antagonistic or contrary
Olid - foul-smelling
Periapt - combative, antagonistic or contrary
Recrement - waste matter, refuse dross
Roborant - tending to fortify or increase strength
Skirr - a whirring or grating sound as made by wings of birds in fligh
Vaticinate - to foretell, prophesy
Vilipend - to treat or regard with contempt

Yes, the article gave the same definition for oppugnant and periapt. Maybe the niddering, agrestic author vilipends the olid verbiage or embrangles it with recrement. He or she mispelled mansuetude.

These are exactly the sort of words about which I am most likely to consult a dictionary.


A comment to the article by Belinda Webb provides a few more gems:

Alabandical: stupefied from drink
Aquabib: water drinker
Auturgy: self-action
Barathrum: an abyss
Cancrizans: to move backwards
Farrago: confused mass of people
Gombeen: trader or moneylender who exploits the disadvantaged through unfair practices
Growlery: retreat for times of ill-humour
Gurrier: juvenile deliquent

Students of music history probably have heard the word cancrizans.

Old Word Tags: words. . . dictionary. . . language

30 Second Spots - OK

It's not great. It's OK.

It's not my shortest 30 second spot, but it is my shortest title, okay?

Click here to hear OK



Copyright (c) November 11, 2007 - 36 seconds




According to an unsupported assertion in this Wikipedia article, OK is the most widely recognized word in the world, okay?

OK Tags: okay. . . OK. . . David Ocker. . . 30 Second Spots

Mr. Composerhead Tells A Cage Story (OR TWO)

A whole month went by during which Mr. Composerhead's overworked amanuensis (that's me) didn't post his writings over on his blog, Mister Composer Head.

But I have just remedied that situation and you are highly encourage to read

Mr. Composerhead Tells A Cage Story (OR TWO)

Before he tells his Cage story (or two) Earle Brown's teaching method and pianists Aloys and Alfons Kontarsky are mentioned. Then a number of more or less complementary words are discussed. These words are:

• nice
• bad
• tough
• tits
• harmless
• interesting

The last, of course, is the well-known all-purpose any-meaning complement that composers find ever so tiresome. Mr. Composerhead wisely suggests some ways that "interesting" might find a second life.


Finally, after a highly amusing mention about his own spatial orientation to things he has trouble comprehending, Mr. Composerhead tells two John Cage stories.

In my opinion the first one is somewhat strange.

And so is the second.

You can decide for yourself - here again is the complete post at Mr. Composerhead's blog:

Mr. Composerhead Tells A Cage Story (OR TWO)

Anger Tags: ComposerHead. . . John Cage. . . Earle Brown. . . Aloys Kontarsky. . . Alfons Kontarsky. . . words

Mixed Meters Celebrates Its Bi-Sesquicentennial

The first Mixed Meters post, entitled In Which David Fails To Find An Interesting First Comment, was on September 16 2005. No one ever read it, so here it is again:

Every new adventure begins with the words "Why am I doing this?" It would be so much easier not to bother trying new things.

If you, future person reading these words, discover that this blog hasn't changed in months . . . years . . . then you'll know I couldn't find a good answer for the question.

My philosophy will be . . . keep it short.

This is the 300th Mixed Meters post. Or maybe the last one was. Hoo-ray! I must have found a good reason for blogging. I wonder what it is.


Obviously keeping it short is not one of my talents. Except maybe over at Mixed Messages - which is much more what I initially imagined for this blog - short throwaway bits.


On April 13, 2006, in honor of the 150th post, I misspelled Mixed Meters Celebrates Its Susquicentennial which featured several cool pictures of a dead tree.


Looks like I've got a tradition started here. Expect a self-congratulatory Mixed Meters announcement every 150th post. It's just like doing it every 100th post, but also divisible by 3, in honor of my three readers. You know who you are. Yeah. Yeah. I know.

The next in the series will be the tri-sesquicentennial which this web page tells me could also be called the semi-nonacentennial.


I've been working behind the scenes lately trying to clean the Mixed Meters code kludge - sweeping the virtual dirt under the virtual rug as it were. Trying to make it easier to find things, to make things look good even on pre-millennial video displays and forcing all the music links to work. I'd also like to create a footer, a section at the bottom to catch objects which fall off the screen.

It's all uphill work for this clueless web developer. I had hoped everything would be ready for this momentous celebration. Vainly hoped, as it turns out.


I'm gratified that the Mixed readership has been increasing over these (nearly) two years. although I still get only a small percentage of the hits which The Rest Is Noise does. That's the biggest music blog. But what can you expect? Alex Ross lets you read his blog for free.


Sincere thanks to all who check out whatever new non-sequiturs I come up with - and extra thanks to those who post occasional comments, gently pointing out when I overlook the obvious. If you're in the neighborhood, drop by sometime. I'll even get out the good scotch.


And, of course, this wonderful person deserves the most thanks of all.

Tricentennial Tags: blogs. . . sesquicentennial. . . skylights